Sex is an essential component of the human experience, and it should be enjoyed by everyone, regardless of ability. People with mobility issues can enjoy sex just as much as everyone else and just as safely. But positions that work for those without mobility issues might not be right for those with particular disabilities. Unfortunately, mainstream culture doesn’t offer enough representation of differently-abled people’s sexual lives, and most of the conversations about sex and disability are riddled with misconceptions.
Regardless of your age, health conditions, mobility issues, or injuries, there are plenty of ways to enjoy sex. Education and exposure are the most important tools in normalizing mainstream discussions of sex amongst differently-abled individuals. Schools must also develop complex sex education curriculums that include having sex with disabilities and mobility issues. Sex alleviates stress, burns calories, reduces the risk of prostate cancer, and offers numerous other benefits — people across all levels of abilities should have access to these benefits without shame or stigma.
It’s also important to emphasize that sex doesn’t only refer to intercourse and penetration. Sex acts can include stimulation with hands, oral sex, and intercourse between individuals of all gender and sexual identities and orientations. In this article, we describe the best sex positions for people with mobility issues and their benefits.
Sit & Stroke
The sit and stroke is one of the best sexual positions for individuals who have trouble standing. The receiver can sit comfortably on a chair, bed, couch, or wheelchair while the giver kneels on the ground in front of the receiver’s genitals. The receiver should ideally place a towel on the ground to cushion their knees or sit beside the receiver. The giver can stroke the receiver’s genitals above or below the pants, according to their preference. If the giver has mobility issues that affect the hands, they can also use a sex toy, such as a dildo or clitoral suction toy.
Facesitting is one of the most versatile oral sex positions, suitable for all genders and sexual orientations. During this position, the individual with the mobility limitation should lie on their back in the dead turtle position. The partner can then straddle the face, allowing the partner with the mobility limitation to eat them out or suck their penis. If both partners have mobility limitations, you can also get a positioning chair, which is designed to be placed over the partner’s mouth — a positioning chair can support the partner on top. This position is ideal for individuals with knee, back, or hip issues.
The partner with lower mobility lays down on the bed with their buttocks on the edge. The other partner stands between their legs, face to face with their partner. The standing partner lifts the other’s legs, resting their ankles on the shoulders. If that’s not possible, the partner with the lower mobility can rest their ankles on a chair behind the standing partner. Once everyone is in position, the standing partner can either thrust into the receiving partner or explore each other’s erogenous zones. This position is suitable if both partners are overweight or obese, if the woman is pregnant, or in couples where one partner has limited mobility.
The face-to-face position is perfect for couples who want the intimacy of staring at each other during sexual intercourse. The partner with limited mobility sits on a chair, bed, or wheelchair with the armrests removed. The other partner wraps their arms around the sitting partner and straddles them with their legs. The partner on the top braces their feet against the chair or bed to thrust inwards. The sitting partner can participate by grabbing their partner’s buttocks, bouncing them up and down, or exploring their erogenous zones. This position is ideal for people with muscle spasms and chronic fatigue.
Hand humper is a hand-based sexual activity that involves rubbing the penis, perineum, or vulva against the partner’s fist, hand, or palm. One partner positions their hands between the other’s hands, allowing the partner with limited mobility to thrust up or down on the hands. If the giver has hand-based mobility issues, such as carpal tunnel, they can also use a strap-on dildo with a hand harness or a clitoral vibrator to stimulate the partner. This is an extremely simple and versatile method for both partners to engage in sex without discomfort.
The sideways 69 is a comfortable position conducive to mutual oral sex, allowing both partners to fellate or lick each other. The regular 69 is pretty famous, but the sideways 69 adds a degree of comfort to the equation, allowing both partners to lie down comfortably on a bed while using their mouths to pleasure the other partner. It doesn’t require the same degree of strength and mobility as a traditional 69. If one or both partners find that giving and receiving pleasure at the same time isn’t comfortable, one of the partners can use a sex toy or vibrator.
Sex swings and slings are often portrayed as kinky sex tools only meant for individuals engaging in extreme sexual fantasies and fetishes. But a sex swing can also facilitate penetrative sex amongst individuals with mobility limitations. A sex swing is specifically designed to help the receiver get into the ideal position for receiving pleasure. Once the individual is positioned on a sex swing, they receive optimal support to stay in the ideal position. The receiver doesn’t have to hold themselves up using their muscular strength, making it extremely comfortable. Sex swings also allow you to experiment with more positions than would be possible otherwise.
As you can see, whatever your mobility issue might be, you have several sex positions to practice. Whichever position you choose, be mindful that you and your partner are completely comfortable throughout the process.